Year of the Dead (without you)

Out there on the tundra where we share that bottle of vodka…I pull you towards me and I breath you in, fill my lungs with the smell of you…but you know I cannot contain the pain…the child at your breast and the husband that holds your hand…who is it we really love when the grey grey sky is falling falls in on us…I walk the dark morning with smell of decay I am the poisoned…the poisoning it seems I cannot escape it’s not sadness that flows from my pores…let me go now my dearest darling…see that sun you love rises upon your bedroom…here we are walking in the year of the dead…hold my hand let me go now let me go now…year of the dead another year of loving you…coffee in the morning mouthful of purple berries on the permafrost…there’s nothing you can do but say goodbye, and push through a smile…did I see you waving….from a distance I’m watching the decay but the cellular advance I can’t see….the closer I get the less i understand…impossible exchanges…for you I am dying…oh how we fucked each other over…so let me go in the year of the dead…go now without me as I am without you without a word


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